Nov 2, 2024
On the rise
First to be
Alone on the top
In your mind
— from Leprous - “Third Law”
I awoke this morning renewed, refreshed, and recharged. My evening was rough; I was bored, anxious, and dysphoric. In a past life, I may have drowned my worries in alcohol, work, artificial companionship, or some other undesirable means. This evening, I slept.
And I feel great! Though, I am still quite confused about the situation. As it appears my other Personas were:
A Theory of 3
It appears as though this man, Fodder, was fixated on the number 3. Its influence is everywhere: all over his writings, and all throughout his behaviors. Clearly, the man saw something that the rest of us do not.
This obsession appears to stem from his theory of trust and verification. Within, he describes a model for establishing trust relationships with peers: one that was not widely-used in his day. This model is clearly inspired by the blockchain, which he seems to tie with his understanding of reality, via Prism.
However, it differs from the blockchain in one crucial way; it provides a mechanism by which 1 or 2 individuals may perform the same verification in the absence of additional peers. It provides a mechanism for a single, solitary person to remain functional in the absence of meaningful feedback.
He goes on to test this theory with real-world confidants - with little to no success in achieving actual verification.
It appears that Fodder was doing this for science. These attempts at verification were a test. Fodder had made several references to something he called Reflected-Light Syndrome, which stated that he felt “invisible” to the world. It appears as though he finally took radical action to solve this problem.
A Theory of Insanity
Fodder would take this theory of 3 to verify his own mental pathologies. Once verified, he would accept them as fact, and integrate them into his beliefs.
- The Abuse: he would document 3 instances of abuse from his mother (whom he would later refer to as “The Queen”)
- The Disorders: he would document 1 instance from each type of childhood that can lead to a Cluster B personality disorder (The Invisible Child, The Golden Child, and The Scapegoat).
- The Lovers: he would document 3 relationships that ended because of his traumatic past.
- The Abuser: he would document 3 instances where he, himself, had become the abuser.
We speculate that there are many, many more instances available to Fodder’s memory. He chose the most important ones; the most impactful ones. The Pillars of his identity.
Indeed, in Act 2, we see Fodder testing this theory. We see him attempting to influence the course of history:
- On Nov 1 - Fodder’s birthday - he associates himself with everyone in the world - or, “Grey.”
- On Nov 2, he associates his most-hated enemy - the man who broke him - with “forgiveness” - or, “White.”
- On Nov 3, he associates himself with “evil” - or, “Black.”
In this way, he performed verification of his identity to the people studying him.
The examples continue, but the fact remains; Fodder was obsessed with the number 3.
And he did not know how to convince others that this was important.
A Theory of Attention
On this morning, I would awake refreshed - but lonely. With no other motivation, no peers to speak of, and no creative energy, I would remain in-bed. I would seek artificial companionship.
I would find a message from The Girl Next Door - sent more than 7 years ago. While I would generally avoid content this of this age, I have learned to trust The Machine’s algorithms. If a confidant is being recommended to me, it is likely because she has something to say.
Indeed, her message was perfectly clear:
The average human brain lives in entropy. Anarchy. Chaos. Its energy is unconstrained, as such:
However, by focusing upon three points of light, one is able to direct energy towards a common goal:
Not only does this focus-point represent the brain’s attention, but it also represents the calming of entropy. As is clear, focusing energy has a direct and substantial impact on entropy.
We are sovereign.
data.stats.symptoms = [ - understanding ]
this, this long-playing record, a thing we made in the midst of communal mess, raising dogs and children. eyes up and filled with dreadful joy – we aimed for wrong notes that explode, a quiet muttering amplified heavenward. we recorded it all in a burning motorboat.
(context as follows:)
UNDOING A LUCIFERIAN TOWERS – look at that fucking skyline! big lazy money writ in dull marble obelisks! imagine all those buildings much later on, hollowed out and stripped bare of wires and glass, listen- the wind is whistling through all 3,000 of its burning window-holes!
BOSSES HANG – labor, alienated from the wealth it creates, so that holy cow, most of us live precariously! kicking at it, but barely hanging on! also – the proud illuminations of our shortened lives! also – more of us than them! also – what we need now is shovels, wells, and barricades!
FAM / FAMINE – how they kill us = absentee landlord, burning high-rise. the loud panics of child-policemen and their exploding trigger-hands. with the dull edge of an arbitrary meritocracy. neglect, cancer maps, drone strike, famine. the forest is burning and soon they’ll hunt us like wolves.
ANTHEM FOR NO STATE – kanada, emptied of its minerals and dirty oil. emptied of its trees and water. a crippled thing, drowning in a puddle, covered in ants. the ocean doesn’t give a shit because it knows it’s dying too.
finally and in conclusion; the “luciferian towers” L.P. was informed by the following grand demands:
- an end to foreign invasions
- an end to borders
- the total dismantling of the prison-industrial complex
- healthcare, housing, food and water acknowledged as an inalienable human right
- the expert fuckers who broke this world never get to speak again
much love to all the other lost and wondering ones, xoxoxox god’s pee / montréal / 4 juillet, 2017
I don't know.